第3章 我是个假穿越者

“咔嚓。”

“哎呦。”

tingdaoyishengtongkudejiaosheng,sirendoufanyingguolai。kandaoluonanyimanmandecongchuangshangxialai,ershangxiachuangzhijiandemutizeyijingduanlie。luonanyideshouwanchuyouyixiefahong,xianglaishiganggangzhuideneiyixiajigezhele。

“噔噔噔……”

“nanyi!”liangjiekandaoluonanyipaolechuqu,ganmangzhuishangqule。

……

“nanyi……”shifenzhonghou,liangjiekanzhejingzuozaihubiandeluonanyi,zhongyurenbuzhukaikou。

chenmoxujiu,luonanyidelingwaisangesheyouyedouzhaoleguolai,haidoubushuxi,yebuzhidaogairuhekaikou。sangerenjiuneimezailuonanyishenhou,qidailiangjiekaikou。

“meishile。”chenmolebantiandeluonanyikaikoule,xiaolexiaoshuodao:“fanzhengzheixienianlaiwoyexiguanle。zhishilaixuexiaodiyitian,zaisanweitongxuemianqianchuchoule,youxiebuhaoyisi。”

luonanyizhanqilai,kanzheshenbiansigebutongxinghaodemeinv,xiaodao:“xiexienimenlaizhaowo。duile,wohaimeinimendelianxifangshini!bujieyijiwogeshoujihaoba!”

shuozhe,luonanyinachushouji,shuodao“wodeshoujihaoshi137,nimenjiwofalaixinxiba,zheiyangjidekuaixie。”

sangesheyoumeiyoutuici,doubazijidemingzidengxinxifajiluonanyi。

“luonanyijiejie!”xiaoluolichuntingkaikoushuodao:“zanmenhuisusheba!”

“bule。”luonanyiyaoyaotoushuodao:“wohaishibanchuquzhuba。”

“luonanyi,ganggangneibushinidecuo。”moxinyuetuiletuiyanjingshuodao:“neigechuangnianjiushixiucaihuaide。nibiefangzaixinshang。”

“qishi,woyikaishijiubuxiangzhuxiaode。”luonanyishuodao:“jiusuanmeiyouganggangdeshiqing,woyedasuanchuquzhude。”

“nanyi,ni……”liangjieganggangdasuankaikou,luonanyijiuhuilehuishoushuodao:“wanshuang,buyongshuole,shiwozijihaiyouqitashiqingyaomangeryi,zaisushebushihenfangbian。”

liangjiedingzheluonanyikanlekan,zuizhongxieqile,tashizhidaojiemeierchuquzhudeyuanyin。shuodao:“jiranruci,neiwoheniyiqichuquzhuba!”

“buyongle,zheiyangyouainijiechuxinhuanjing。wanshuang,niyexuyaojiejiaoxindepengyouni!”luonanyijujuedao:“wojiuzaixiaowaixiaoquzhu,baitianzaixuexiao,wanshangguoqushui。”

luonanyiyouniutoukanxianglinxinrudengren,xiaodao:“sanweishiyou,woshaohouzaihuisusheba,beirushenmedoujiuliususheba,fanzhengbaitianwohaidehuisushezhuni!”

“neixiexinglishixiaoshier。”gaolengdelinxinrukaikoushuodao:“woduibenshibijiaoshuxi,wodainiqufujinxiaoqukankanyoumeiyouheshidedifangzhuba。”

“nei,mafannile。xiexienilinxinru。”luonanyixiaole,xiaodeneimezhencheng。

“我也帮忙吧!”

“我也去!”

“ziranyeshaobulewola!”

liangjiesanrenyitongkaikoushuodao,douyaobangluonanyizaixiaowaizhaozhudedifang。

“xiexie!”luonanyihenkaixin,jishiyanjinglishanleshanjingyingdeguangliang。zaiyiqian,zhiyoujiarenheliangjieshizhenxinduita,buzaihutadeshencaiyangmao,danshitanengganjuedao,sangexinshiyouyebuhuijieyizheixie。

……

“咚咚咚。”

menwaichuanlaiyizhenqiaomensheng。

“xiaochao,qukaimen。”zhengzaibaizhidiannaoderenkaikoushuodao。

“xiaoqiu,shuoleduoshaociwojiaomuchang!”muchangnuhoudao,danhaishiguaiguaiqukaimenle,bijingzhiqianbeizheigejishuzhaibishidetiwuwanfu。

“知道啦,小超。”

“**小秋!”

dakaimen,muchangkandaomenkoushiyigehengaopianheidenanzi。

“hei!nihao。”heigaogekanmenkaile,jiuwanglizou,yibianshuodao:“nimenhao,liangweishiyou,woyeshizheigesushede,wojiaolidashan。”

“nihao,woshizhuqiu,jinikaimendexiaodishixiaochao。”zhuqiulikaidiannao,duizheganggangjinlaidelidashanjieshaodao,shunbianbashoushenleguoqu。

lidashantongyangshenchushou,wolewo,shuodao:“nihao,meixiangdaonilaishangxuehaidaizhexiaodia。”lidashankanshangquyouxieleng,danbingbusha,zirantingchuzhuqiuzaikaiwanxiao,yejiushunzhewangxiashuoleyiju。

“shuoxiaole,zheigexiaodishiwoganggangshoude。”zhuqiuxiaodao:“neigefeichaizaiwolaideshihoubaizhilebantianmensuomeigaoding,ranhoubeiwufenzhongjiejuebingqianghua,kanzhetaneichongbaideyanshen,wocaijuedingshouxiatadexigai。”

“xiaoqiunigoule!”muchangbeibishideyouxiebuzizaile,shuodao:“bujiushihuixiugesuoma?zheiyoushenmelebuqide。”

“kebushixiusuoneimejiandano!”zhuqiuxiaolexiaoshuodao:“neimejiandandehua,dashanxiongdizenmekenengyongkajinbulai?queqiedeshuo,wobasuodeshuakaxi,mimaxitongdoupingbile。erqiechulewo,xuexiaoshenzhizhuanyekaisuogongsiyemeifagaoding。”

“neiyihouzenmejinlai?”lidashannaolenaotouwendao。

“dangranshiyongzhiwena!zheigekeshizhengjingdezhiwensuoai。”zhuqiulisuodangrandeshuodao:“buguozhiwenluruxuyaowotongyi,yeshiwoshezhide。kexi,womeidaibiedegongju,qishizheigesuowoyoubawoshengjiweiyongtongkongkaisuo。”

“lihai。”lidashanchongzhezhuqiushenleshendamuzhishuodao:“bukuishijishudi!”

“qie~”muchangbufuqidedao。

lidashanyibianshoushichuangpu,yibianheliangrenliaozhetian。taziranyijingzhidaole,liangrenjiushihukan,poyouchouweixiangtoudeganjue。jueduibuhuinaochushenmemaodunlai,shibushideyejiaruliangrendeliaotian。erzhuqiuyechoukongranglidashanbazhiwenjiajinlesuoli。

……

“咚咚咚。”

“dashanqukaimen!”tingdaoqiaomensheng,muchangshuoleyiju,ranhoujixugenzhuqiuhukanqilai,neirongziranshiqianshidejisuanjineirong,zheigehejinshengmeiyouchongtu。zuoweichuanyuezhe,nagebushiwangbazhiqiyilou,xiaodilaitou,naocandirenbeicai,meinvruhuai……ertaxianzaijuranbeiyigetuzhubishi,tarenweitashizaiweizunyanerzhan……haozhonger!

“dajiahao,woshichuliancheng。”menkou,jinlaiyigefeichangshuaiqidenanren,dayueyimibadeshengao,shencaixiuzhangyuncheng,yishuangyoushendeheimou,xiaoshoudemianrong,peishangyishuangdazhangtui……yinanrendeyanguangkanshangqu,dousuanshishuai,zhiyunvren,xiangbihuiyinqibushaohuachiguanzhu……

“aiya!meixiangdaodiyitianbaodaojiubasusherencouqile。”zhuqiukanlekanjinlaideren,xiangbishizuihouyigeshiyou。ranhoujixuduizhemuchangshuodao:“xiaochaoa!nishuonigaoyuzhuangbibuguolidashan,shuaibuguochuliancheng,zhishanghaibeiwonianya,nibushixiaodisheishi?”

chulianchenggangjinlai,faxianbuyuanchuliangrentidaozijimingzi,danshi……beinanrenkuashuaizhenbushishenmehaoshiera!gaolengdetadoubuyoudechouchulexiazuijiao。

……

banxiaoshihou,sigerendouhuxiangshuxile,muchangbeiaidefaxian,takenengshigejiadechuanyuezhe,shuohaodewangbazhiqini?shuohaodezhujiaoguanghuanni?shibushidoufenjizheisangeshiyoule?

tiyutezhangsheng,shixiangquannengdelidashan,gaolengfuerdaijueduidexicaoshenzhixiaocaoyoulijingzhengzhechuliancheng,haiyouzishenjishudi,quanguolikegaokaozhuangyuandezhuqiu。

“hahaha!xulaoer,renmingba!”dangsirenbaowanjiguanyunianlingshengri,paiwannianlingdaxiaozhihou,muchangdiyiciganjuedaoyangmeituqi。mengshengdelidashanbuchuyiwaidenianlingzuida,yunshengdezhuqiupaizaidier,jishengdemuchangdisan,modoubendihushidechulianchengzuixiao。

“zhenshifengshuilunliuzhuana,xulaoer。”muchangxiaolebantian,caijixushuodao:“jintianjiusuannibiedefangmianbawobishidetiwuwanfu,danshinixulaoerdemingzizugouwoxiaoyibeizi。”

shuowan,jixuxiaoleqilai,taganjuejiuzheiyigexiaohuazugoutaxiaochubakuaifujilai……

lidashanyijingtingtalianghukanxujiu,ziranzhidaoliangrende“enyuan”,suiranyexiaolehuier,danshitajinliangrenzhule。

chulianchengyerenbuzhuxiaoleqilai,gao(jian)leng(tan)detazheimexiaoqilai,haizhenyouxiexiemei。

“haolahaolaxiaochao!”zhuqiurenbuzhuzuzhidao:“xiaogouleba!”

“xiaobugou,haha,yibeizidouxiaobugou。”muchangshuodao:“kanniyihouzaibishiwo。”

“铃铃铃~”