魔都。
一家二手车行内。
yigeshenchuanhuangsedaopao，zuoshouchitaomujian，youshouchishoujizhibodenianqingxiaohuo，zhengleerbupidexiangzhibojiandewangyoujiaomai。
“ganxiegeweilaotiedezhichi。”
“womenxiongdichexingzhudadejiushiyigexinren，zhudadejiushiyigezhenshi。”
“童叟无欺！”
“jiazuqiye，zhuanzhuhunhuanershouchesanshinian！”
“shuogalejige，jiugajige，jueduibuhuiyourenhedeqimanxingwei。”
“womenchexing，yijingshibinyiguanlianxusanshiniandezhongyaohezuohuobanle。”
“价格透明。”
……
qintiankanzhezhibojianliderenqibiandeyuelaiyuegao，shuodeyeshiyuelaiyueqijingle。
haoshuodaishuo，xianzaizhibojianliyijingyouliangqiangezaixianguanzhongle。
huashuoqintianconglaodiedeshoulijieguozheigeershouchexingyijinglianggeyuele，yingshengshengyiliangcheyemeimaichuqu。
zaizheimexiaqu，qintiankejiudechitule。
gengguanjiandeshi，xianzaiqintianxinlizhejiya。
jiuzaibangeyueyiqian，qintianjuexinglehunhuanchexitong。
xitongjiqintiandexinshourenwujiushizaiyigeyueneimaichushilianghunhuanche。
xianzaiyijingguoquledabangeyuele，haishiwurenwenjin，qintianyouqinengbuzheji。
weilenenggoubachemaichuqu，qintiankeshilianzhibojiandegezhongbeizhudoujigaile。
shishishangtamenjiadexiongdiershouchexingquequeshishishizuoshiguchede。
qizhongzuizhuyaodejiushiyinweixiangzheizhongshiguche，tebieshizheizhongdaihunhuandeche，jiageshijueduidebianyi。
yiqiantalaodiezuodeshihou，jibendoushiyinzangchekuang，duiyuhunhuandeshiqingzhizibuti。
dantiandixianayoubuloufengde？
manmandetamenchexingdeshengyijiuyuefayuedanbo，erqintianlaodieyezaishanggeyuechuyiwaisashourenhuan。
qintianxianzaishifanqidaoxingzhi。
xianzaiqintianzhudadejiushiyigechekuangtouming，zhudadejiushiyifenzhencheng。
zheimeyibocaozuozhijiejiubazhibojiandewangyouzhenjingle。
【主播666。】
【魂环二手车？】
【wojuedeguangzhubozheiyidian，jiuyijingdabailequanguo90%decheshangle。】
【zhenyouzheimechengxin，wobuxin！chufeinidaiwokankan。】
……
kandaozhibojiandeqifenbeidiaojieqilai，gengyouwangyoukaishitichuyaokanche，qintiandunshigenglaijingshenle。
“lailailai，jirangeweijiarenbuxiangxin，jintianwojiudaigeweijiarenjianshijianshi。”
“womenxiongdichexingzhudadejiushichengxin，jueduideshuoyibuer，youjigehunhuanjiushuojigehunhuan。”
“weilebiaoshiwomendechengyi，womenhaizhuanmenzhaolaileheigouheijinglibangmangyanzheng。”
shuozhe，qintianyishenglingxia，chexinglideyigehuojibianqianzheyitiaodaheigouzoulechulai。
“jiarenmen，womenchexinglishenmechedouyou，shangdaobinli，xiadaopingmindaibuche、gaoduanpaoche、bba，gezhonghunhuanzhanche。”
“jiarenmenxiangkannayiliang，wodainimenkan。”
【yo，meixiangdaoa，zhuboyewuhaitingguangfan，cunhuohaimanduode。】
【yi，neiliangmashahaoxiangtingbucuode，jiukanneiliangmashabei。】
……
xianzaiwangyoumensuoshuodeshiyiliangbaisedemashaladizongcai。
qintianyebuduoshuo，zhijiexiangwangyoumenjieshao：“zheishi20kuandemashaladizongcai，biaozhunban。”
“3.0t，350mali，v6fadongji，zuidaniuju500！”
“erqiehaishishuangwolundefadongji。”
“xianzaiyouhuijiazhixuyaoshierwaner，ewaizaizengsongyicibaoyang。”
“dajialaikanyikan，tadewaiguanfeichangdeshuaiqi，chelizidaisanhunhuan。”
tingzheqintiankankanertan，wangyoumenchadianmeixiaopenle。
【haojiahuo，yuanchezidaisanhunhuan？？】
【neiyisijiushishuo，chulesijiyiwai，qitadedoumanzuobei？】
【haha……sanhunhuan，wanyiyuanchezhudinghaozenmeban？】
【wojuedezheizhongcheyouyigehaochu，yewankaichedeshihoubuyongjimo。】
【buguozheijiagequeshigouyouhui，20kuandemashazongcai，zuibianyiyedeqishiduowan，nizheishierwanduojiunengkaizou？】
【zheishibunengguohudecheba？】
……
kanzhewangyoumenzheimeshuo，qintiandunshibuleyile：“jiarenmen，zhubozuoshengyijiangjiudeshichengxin，jueduibuhuiyinmanrenhedechekuang，womenzuchuandejiayeconglaibumaijingpinche，zhuanzhufeijingpinchesanshinian！”
“youqishanzhanghunhuanche。”
“womendechemeiyiliangdoushinenggoubaozhengguohubingqieshouxuqiquande，zhibuguoshicheshangzidaihunhuan，yaoshiyunqihao，shuobudinghainengjiandaopifusuipian。”
“lai，wojidajiakanyikanzheilvbendeguohujilu。”
shuozhe，qintianzhuanshenzoujinbangongshi，meiguoyihuijiunachulezheiliangmashadelvben。
qintianyebubixian，zhijiedakailvben。
qichedelvbenjihudouhuiyouguohujilu。
dangzheilvbendeguohujiluchuxianzaijingtoumianqiandeshihou。
网友们顿时乐了。
zheiliangmashadeshourenchezhujiaozhoutianfeng！
dierrenchezhujiaozhouyu，zhibuguoguohuleixingshangmianxiezhejicheng。
zaidaodisanrenchezhu，jiaozhoutianyun，guohuleixingshangmianhaishixiezhejicheng！
erdaodisirenchezhujiushiqintianle。
“jiarenmen，nimenkandaolemeiyou，zheiqianmiandesanrenchezhudoushitongyigejiazude，zheichewoyoulejieguo，dierrenchezhushidiyirenchezhudeerzi，disanrenchezhugendiyirenchezhushiqinxiongdi。”
【哇……牛批！】
【gangcaikandaozheijichengdeshihou，wohaiyoudianmengbi，xianzaiwosuanshimingbaile，yuanlaitemezheisangehunhuandoushiyijiaren！！】
【laodiegale，erzijie？erzigale，xiongdijieshou？】
【zhudadejiushiyijiarenzhengzhengqiqi？】
【woca……neizheiliangchedaodiyouduoxiemenni，yijiarenkai，yijiarendouchenghunhuanle？？】
【zheizhuboshizhendelaoshi，zheishiwozhijinweizhi，yudaozuiliangxindeyigezhubo，zuiliangxindeyigechefanzi。】
……
“jiarenmen，nimenkeyaokanqingchua，zheikeshiyiliangmasha，xinchezhidaojiayibailiushiwan，ershouchedexingqingdagaizaibashiwanzuoyoufudong，xianzaizaiwozheili，zhixuyaoshierwaner，keyixiaodao。”
“shierwanerdemasha，maibudaochikui，maibudaoshangdang，ruguogukemaihuiqu，faxianchekuanghewojiangshudeyourenhebufu，suishikeyituikuan。”
“wofeichanghuanyingzuchegongsidelaoban，huozhehunqinggongsidelaobanguolaipiliangmaiche，jiagefangmianhaoshangliang，wokeyijinimensuandezaiyouhuiyidian。”
zheihuashuochulai，zhibojiandewangyougengshiwuyule。
【可以小刀？】
【wonima……bashiwandemasha，maidaoshierwanhaikeyixiaodao？huashuozhubonizheichedaodiyouduoxiemen？】
【xiebuxiemenwobuzhidao，wozhizhidaokaizheichedeyijiasankoudouzhengzhengqiqide，meizhundaoshihouhainengcongcheshangzhaodaopifusuipian。】
【woca……zheilaobanzhenshigouchengshide，chekuanghenishuodeyourenhebufu，suishikeyituiche？？】
【haosaodecaozuoa！！】