zhongmokanzhemianqiandelianggexuanxiang，zuijiaozaicichouchou。
嘤嘤怪？
爸爸饶命？
华国第一娘炮？
xitongzheishixiangexinsiwo，ranhoujichengwodehuabei？
buzhidaowoshitaihejinzhinanma？
takanzhemianqianyilianxionghendedaitu，xinlihaishiyouxiefachu，haishiyingzhetoupi，daheyisheng：“qin，bienao，xiaoquanquanchuinie！”
hualuo，youshouxiguanxingdebaichuyigelanhuazhi，wumeidongren，fengqingwanzhong。
王国康：“……”
“wocao，yongzuiniangdeyuqishuochuzuibaqidehua，nandaozheibushijiemuxiaoguo？”
“nimenquedingzheibushigaoxiaoleidezongyijiemu？wodouyaoxiaopenle。”
“zheigeqiangjiefanjueduishilinshiyanyuan，jiangshilian，wukuaiqiandeliezhiduandao，sheiganshuozheibushijuben？”
“wocao，wocaocao，wogangchidebaoyulongxia，shanzhenhaiwei，quandoutule，peiwo！”
“laofuguankanzongyijiemuduonian，buguanduoexinduonankan，laofudounengweiweiyixiao，mianbugaise，danshizheicilaofushizairenbuzhule，wo——zhuo——ni——mei，taitamaexinle！”
……
直播间瞬间炸了。
guangdashuiyouqunqingjifen，tucaodetucao，exindeexin，tongmadetongma，shenzhiyourenjianyixiangjuzutousu，zhijiebazhongmotaotaichuju。
yenanguaishuiyoufanyingqianglie！
haohaodezhiyetiaozhansai，niyingshengshengnongtuyidapian！
zheide——langfeiduoshaoliangshi？
……
导播间！
yigesishiduosuidezhongniannanrenzaiyangguangdezhaoshexia，lanyangyangdezaitangyishangbaichuyigegeyoutang，zuoshoushouji，youshouyibeigouqipaoshui，zhengheshuiyouyiyang，zoumaguandengdekanzhemeigezhibojian。
tashencaixiaoshou，liuzheliangpiexiaohuzi，shangbanshenchuanzheyijianbaisexiaobeixin，xiabanshenshiyitiaohuibaigezideshatanku，toushanghaixiedaizheyidinghuisedenanguamao，kanqilaibulunbulei，haowuxingxiangkeyan。
tajiushi《mingxingzhiyetiaozhansai》zongdaoyan，zongcehuarensongmin，qianhoucehuazhuchilesikuanzongyijiemu，kuankuanbaokuan，yepenghonghenduomingxing，chengweizongyijiemudashi。
taweilerang《mingxingzhiyetiaozhansai》zaichuangzijishiyededianfeng，choubeiliangnian，qianqidegezhongzaoshi，haixuan，xuanchuan。zheidangzongyijiemuhaimeikaibo，yijinghuodefazi，buguanshiguanzhuduhaishiredu，douchuyugedapingtaiqiansanming。
xianzaijiemuyijingkaishi，gaijiaodaidedouyijingjiaodaixiaqu，tayetoudebanriqingxian。
“ng，bailuxuanzedeshihuanweigongren，zheideduojingbaoa？”
“ng，dengchaozaijiudiandangdachu？waimianyijingyouyiliang120jiuhuchesuishidaiming！”
“chenhesongwaimai？zheishuangdafeituikendingyaofeile！”
“e？wujinzaigewutingdanggeshou？zheichangdeshi——shishangzhiyoumamahao？？！！”
……
“songdao，wozheiliyoulianggexiaoxi，yigeshihuaixiaoxi……”
zhulizhaokuangmantoudahandechongdaotamianqian，shengyindoujiazhezhanyin。
songminmeimaoqingtiao，minleyikougouqishui，manbujingxindao：“xiaozhao，niyijinggenlewosinian，zenmejiuzuobudaochushibujing，linweibuluanni？zaishuole，tianyouyoutabuxialai。”
“shibushifashengyiwaile？bashigecansaizhe，fashengyiwaibushihenzhengchangma？”
“wozaizhunbeizheidangjiemudeshihou，yijingkaolvguowushiliuzhongyiwai，erqieyezhidinglexiangyingdeduice！”
“yigehuaixiaoxi，lingwaiyigekendingshihaoxiaoxi，duibudui？zhendiaopi！”
“songdao，lingwaiyigeshi——genghuaidexiaoxi！”
sheizhidaozhaokuangxiaoshenghuidadao。
宋敏脸色瞬间黑了。
“xiaozhao，nidouwoba？zheicaikaiboyigeduoxiaoshi……”
“songdao，gangcaiyoushangbaimingguanzhongtousu81haocansaizhe，shuo，shuorangtagundan！”
songmintaiqitou，zhabaleliangxiayanjing，yiliandaimengdekanzhezhaokuang。
“xiaozhao，nizuowanheduoleba？womenyigongbashigecansaizhe，naermaochu81haocansaizhele？”
“songdao，ninwanglejialiyule，mianfei，zengsong，neige，le？”
songminyileng，likexiangdaoshenme，yangqiyoushou，henhenshanlezijiyigedazuibazi。
果然！
免费的才是坑爹的！
“理由呢？”
“niangqishizu，jubenhenjitaizhong，haiyou，langfei，liangshi。”
songminshenshenxileyikouqi，liangzhishouniechengquantou，yousongkai，youniechengquantou，lianshangdebiaoqingzhengningchouxiang。
“diergehuaixiaoxini？buhuiyehetayouguanba？”
“songdao，diergehuaixiaoxishi——taganggangyudaochidaodaitu，suishikenengkaixi！”
“咣当！”
“songdao，nizenmele？kuai，kuailairena！”
……
“mimijie，mimijie，chudashile！”
yangmikanzhefengfenghuohuochongjinbangongshidereba，zuoshoufulefue，youxiewunaidao：“reba，jintianshizhibodiyitian，erqietamenwugeqianqidoujingguosangeyuedechangguipeixun，zaichayechadaonaerqu！”
shuozhezheihua，tazhanqishen，shenleshenlanyao，zuolejigejiandandedongzuo，xiongqiandeliangzuozhumulangmafenghaoxiangyaotupoxiaoxizhuangdeshufu，huyuerchu，zaijiashangtajingzhidewuguan，yangzhibanbaixidepifu，yijiaotuyouzhideshencai，zugoumiaoshashijianwushunanren！
tajinniangangershijiu，haimeijiehun，zhengchuyuyigenvrendehuangjinshiqi！
“mimijie，bushitamenwuge，shizhongmo！”
rebajidexiangyigereguoshangdemayi，yuandizhidazhuan。
benlaizheidangzongyijiemuyoutayigeminge，danshiqiantianwanshangtufagaoshao，zhinengrangqitayirendaiti！
buguorebayemeidangzuoyihuishi，heleliangtianyao，jiupaolaigongsimoyu。
哦。
不！
shibangmimijiedingzheneiwugeyiren，suishixiangtahuibao！
“钟墨？”
“tayouzenmele？niushanglejiao？haishigeshangleshouzhitou？haishizuozaijiebiankuni？”
yangmitingdaozhongmozheigemingzi，xiaolianzhoudehexiaolaotouyiyang。
tashangbeizikendingdanaotiangong，shunbianchuailerulaifozudepigu，caihuizhaolaizheimeyigeqipa！
dangchuruguobushineizhangbiduzhedalaoyeshaoxunyidiandeshuailian，zijihuihetaqianyue？
sheizhidaoliangnianguoqule，chuleyijiuneimeshuai，yanji，gechang，tiaowu，meiyigezhilengqilaide。
buguoxiangdaotaneizhanghaowuxiacideshuailian，renbuzhuyanleyankoushui。
谁让自己是颜狗呢？
zheimedadegongsi，yangyilianggexianren，yebushibukeyi！
“bushi，mimijie，zhongmotayudaochidaodaitu，suishihuiga！”
sheizhidaoyangmimanbujingxindeweizijidaoleyibeishui，lianshangluchuyouyadexiaorong。
“ququyigechidaodaitu，youshenmedanxinde？”
“tashilixiaolongma？tashihuoyuanjiama？tashishiwaagema？danding！”
“蜜蜜姐！”
rebasuozaiyipang，sesefadou。
“咔嚓！”
yangmishouzhongdebolishuibeiniedefensui。
“zhongmo，nitaniangdeweilebujilaoniangxineiku，jingranwanqijubensha？haishizheimelandetaolu。laoniangxianzaijiuguoqu，xiankanniyibailingbadao，ranhouzaizisha，fanzhengdajiadoubiexianghuole！”
“mimijie，nibangongshizenmehuifangcaidaoni？aiyo，neibushijubensha，shizhendechidaodaitu……”
……
现场！
zhongmoyebeizijigangcaineigelanhuazhiexindechadiantule。
没办法！
xiguanchengziran，yishizhijianwufagaibian！
“neige，dage，qishiwoxihuanzhinan，wopei，bushi，woshishuozhinanxihuanwo，pei，yebushi，wodeyisishiwoshiyigewande，e，qishiwodiyisi，nidongdi……”
jiusuanxitongjiashen，zhongmodiyicimianduichidaodaitu，xinlihaishihuangdeyipi，zuidoupiaodaotaipingyangle。
wangguokangxinligengshiyiwanpicaonimabentengerguo。
yuanyiweizheiciyudaoyigefeiyang，quebuxiangshigeniangpao。
danshikankanduifangneishuangtaohuafanlandeshuangyanheshuliandelanhuazhi，yijishengshimeiyan！
taxindijingranyinyinshengqiyisideqidai！
不对！
zijitangtanggangtiezhinan，zenmenengbeiyigeniangpaodaiwanni？
“chouniangpao，qusiba！”
wangguokangxinlishanguoyisibushe，danshiweilezhengmingzijideqingbai，haishihuiqiduandao，chaozhezhongmoxiongkouhenhentongqu。
娘炮？
娘炮你个大西瓜！
你全家都是娘炮！
劳资是钢铁直男！
zhongmoqideliansefahei，yiquanhuzaiwangguokangdelianshang。
“轰！”
车门——飞了！
王国康——飞了！
tazuilidesanshierkeyachi——quanfeile！
“哗！”
直播间再次炸裂了。